


A Sapphires Strength

by Writingbymegz



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Angst, Author is Dyslexic and apologies for spelling mistakes x, Based after 804, Brienne is learning to be a mother, Brienne is the best woman about, Game Of Thrones S8 never happened, I don’t know how to tag lol, Jaime is an idiot, Tarth, Unplanned Pregnancy, joanna is the golden child
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:49:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22367449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writingbymegz/pseuds/Writingbymegz
Summary: Brienne of Tarth and her only daughter Joanna are facing the world of Westeros after the Destruction of Kingslanding.
Relationships: Arya Stark/Gendry Waters, Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth, Podrick Payne/Sansa Stark
Comments: 25
Kudos: 88





	1. The Past

And there he went... off on his horse... off to see his sister... off to basically die with his sister.... his true love...

Those were the words that were in Briennes head the night he left her. She remembers that night sadly too well. She had rolled over to look into his deep eyes but he wasn’t there staring back. Instead his side of their bed was empty. Their bed... their bed... the bed where they did things couples would do.. married couples. That’s what Brienne thought was going to potentially happen. Married to the Lannister. The Kingslayer. The handless Knight. But instead he was going back to Cersei. Back to the reason why there was going to be another war. The woman who Brienne hated so so much. 

Now she was left alone in the Yard. Shivering in the Winterfell cold. Shivering because of the now emptiness in her body. She truly loved him. She thought he was the one. But obviously not. 

She walked back to their... her room and shut the door tight. She collapsed against the door... tears streaming down her face. She felt weak. She hadn’t cried this much in a long time. Crying over a man. That wasn’t like her. As she cried out for him she couldn’t breathe that well. She felt like the time her mother had died back when she was only little. Her best friend was gone.

Those tears were gone by the next morning. Life went back to normal for Brienne. She walked with Sansa in the morning. Went at her post for the afternoon and ate dinner with the lords and ladies of Winterfell. People stared at her however, with pity in their eyes. They knew about the relationship, they knew that there was “something” between the lady knight and the Kingslayer. 

Life went on...

....

The war was over.... Cersei was dead... Daenerys was dead... Jaime was dead...

Brienne was now Lord commander of the Kingsguard. Bran the broken was named king of the now Six Kingdoms. She had a title that she never thought she would ever have. She was living her best life... until she found out she was pregnant.

Pregnant with the Lannister baby. Pregnant with his baby.  
Pregnant with Jaime’s baby.

Those tears came back that night she found out. She never thought she could every have children due to the war her body had gone through and she was shocked at that fact. But what upset her largely was that she was carrying a dead mans child. A man she no longer cared for until this moment. She cried herself to sleep, trying to figure out what she was going to do with her life now.

She had never imagined herself to be a mother. The reality of childbirth put the fear of the seven in her. She lost her own mother due to the childbed and now she may loose her own life. She didn’t know how to be a mother. She didn’t know how to care for someone else’s life apart from her own.

She was in the Kingsguard. She was meant to protect the king. But now with a babe in her belly she wouldn’t be able to. She wanted to keep the baby. She wanted to be able to make her father “proud”... and maybe even for Jaime.

That talk with Bran was dreaded but it went well. She was scared of what he was going to say. Whether he was going to be angry... mad... upset? He knew that conversation was coming. Bran had a way where he knew what was happening and what the future would hold. 

She was to be sent off to Tarth to live with her father and the babe would be born there. The child wouldn’t be a bastard but would have a name. “Tarth”. Bran understood who the father was and knew how much it would mean to Brienne to have her baby legitimised. He had the upmost respect for Brienne and allowed her to be able to do what she wanted to do. 

Brienne left in her 4th moon of pregnancy and moved to her fathers isle. She was back home after all those years. Her father welcomed her with loving arms, holding his only child tightly, her belly beginning to show, full with child. 

She felt at peace at Tarth. She had her father right beside her now, his warmth gave her strength to keep going. She hadn’t told her father when she was writing to say she was coming back home for a while that she was with child and was full of fear when she had docked the boat in the harbour. 

When she said those words “I’m pregnant” to her father, his face lit up. He didn’t care at all who the father was, of the child would have a name to a family, all he cared was that his daughter was well and safe at home and hopefully happy. He laid his hand gently on her bump and held his daughter close. He promised to protect both of them... to be a grandfather was all he ever wished and now his dreams had came true.

She spent her days walking about her home isle, meeting people she hadn’t seen in years. Everyone was happy that the Evenstars daughter was home and with child. She didn’t realise that she often held her bump, like a comfort toy to a child, holding on for safety.

Those days in Tarth were spent in peace. She wasn’t in war anymore. Her body could rest from most of the physical and emotional pain... apart from some aspects of her life. 

She couldn’t spar that often as she would have liked due to the child. She knew she needed to take it easy due to what happened to her mother. She wanted what was best for the child and as well as herself, something she hadn’t done in a long long time. However she took over the sparring lessons with the young children who lived on the island. Every morning before lessons she took them out and taught both boys and girls that basic dance of fighting, something she was never allowed to do as a child due to it being frowned upon due to her gender. That never stopped her however. 

....

It was nearing her 8th moon of pregnancy when she had an unexpected visitor. A vision of the past. It was a person who she didn’t know how much she had missed until he appeared in front of her at the dining halls. 

Tears had began in her eyes, a mix of both her hormones and overall emotional build up over the past number of moons. Brienne bent down and hugged Tyrion. Jaimes brother. Tyrion held her close, crying out. He knew so well about Jaime and Briennes past and had always hoped that he would do what was right and stay with Brienne for the rest of his life.

The child began to move in Briennes belly, showing their support to her. She smiled and laid her hand there, taking Tyrion’s hand as well and laying it on her belly. He looked up at her deep blue eyes and smiled. 

“If only he was....”

Brienne looked down, she couldn’t say anything. She couldn’t bare to say his name anymore. He had cause her so so much pain over the past number of moons. 

Brienne went to bed that night, a bundle of emotions over her babies dead father. Crying how she may not be able to cope without him. Not knowing how to be a mother to this child.

....

Brienne had just gotten comfortable in her bed when her waters broke. The worst was yet to come for her. All the fear came into her body at that point when she got up and the first contractions had began. The pain wasn’t that sore, she had been through worse battles.

The woman who came to help her through childbirth was quickly sent for and sent out as soon as she walked in through the doors. Brienne wanted to go through this battle alone. She needed to do this alone. She knew she could win.

Her father knocked on the door a while after the pains had began. She was leaning against the cold stone walls, trying to lower her body temperature when he came in and help to tight to his body.

“You can do this my golden girl. You know it my love. That’s my brave girl”

Tears came out of both of their blue eyes. They both knew the dark reality of childbirth. Brienne lost her mother to the childbed, Selwyns wife. He gave her one last hug, promised to be outside the room until the child was born and left her to continue her labour.

The pains had gotten worse in the few hours of childbirth. She knew she was near the end soon. The contractions were close as they were at the start. She felt the urge to push

On the edge of her bed, she knelt down and began to push. The pain was the worst she had ever felt in her life. No war scars had felt this way. The women were right, childbirth was the worst pain ever. 

A long push later the head was born, the child let out a quiet noise, a meow, the lion cub was near born. One large push later and Brienne felt the baby leave her body and landed on the blankets laid on the ground. 

Brienne began to cry as she lifted her child into her night shirt. All fear of motherhood left her. Her baby was in her arms. She looked down and saw she had a daughter. A golden lion cub. Her blonde locks were beautiful. She was beautiful.

The childbirth woman came in after a few moments, telling Selwyn he would meet his grandchild soon. The cord was cut and she cleaned up both baby and mother. After a glance over, her daughter was healthy overall.

Brienne took her daughter and fed her, not wanting another woman to feed to child. The bond with her baby was so so important and she felt so full with pride and love for the little girl. 

Selwyn met his granddaughter with tears streaming down his face. He was so proud of both of them. So proud of how his daughter did. He held both of them in his large arms and embraced his family.

....

Joanna Lannister was the golden child. She had the looks of both her father and mother. She had a mother who loved her dearly and a grandfather who spoiled her. The rest of her large extended family loved her... but this journey doesn’t end her. Life in Westeros wasn’t that simple...


	2. The Present

At the age of 15, Joanna L of Tarth was one of the best fighters about. She was like her mother, a true warrior. From no age she was out in the training yard, wooden sword in her hand, fighting with the Straw bales. Her mother wanted her out and training and to be free to do whatever she wanted to do. 

Joanna was a true warrior. She knew how to protect herself. It was in her blood to fight, to protect others.

It was early morn and Joanna was out in the with the new starts. Boys and girls who wanted to go out and learn to fight were free to do so. Brienne never had that opportunity as a child due to her gender but now all had changed. 

As Joanna was out with two of the young children, she saw her mother in the distance walking over looking upset. Joanna dismissed them as her mother walked over to her, taking note of her sad expression.

“Joanna, it’s your grandfather”

Joanna ran away from her mother, heading towards the room where her Grandpapa Selywn resided. Tears were forming in the teenagers eyes as she knocked on the door, knowing what may be ahead of her.

Her grandfather was lying down on his bed, looking as weak as he had ever been in the last number of moons since the maester had diagnosed him with some terminal and untreatable illness.

....

Joanna has always been close to her grandfather. He was the father figure in her life, since she had none. From the moment they met, the bond was mighty. Joanna was his only grandchild. He loved her like he loved her mother. She was perfect in his eyes.

Growing up, Joanna went to her grandfather for with many of her problems. When she felt alone, she went to him due to her mother being out often with the guards. He used to always tell her the one thing he always told Brienne 

“You’re a Tarth. You’re as strong as the wind, as tall as the waves and most importantly as beautiful as a sapphire”

Every night her and her grandfather would meet up and eat together. It was their time of day where they would rest and talk about things. She loved those meetings so much.

She wasn’t like the rest of the girls in Tarth, much like her mother. She rather have been out fighting and training instead of being in sewing classes. She liked being messy, in control of what she wanted to do instead of being told what to do. She wanted to be in control. 

When the news came in that Selywn was ill, Joannas heart was broken. She faced loosing her best friend. She faced loosing her father and grandfather built in one. 

Her mother was the same. She was in disbelief. Her father was always there for her no matter what. The stories that Brienne had told Joanna of her grandfather were absolutely amazing. 

Joanna spent those few days in agony. She couldn’t believe that her days with Selywn were becoming few, that it was near the end. The Evenstar was near the seven.

Joanna spent many nights in her room crying herself to sleep... the pain was taking over her body...

But she always remembered... “You’re a Tarth. You’re as strong as the wind, as tall as the waves and most importantly as beautiful as a sapphire”

....

“My beautiful girl, my sweet Joanna.... I’m sorry I couldn’t see you grow up. I’m sorry that we can’t have our talks anymore my love”

Selwyn was near the end. He was on his death bed, but his heart was still as full as ever. He was so proud of both his girls. 

Brienne had walked into the room at this point. She walked over to her daughter and kissed her on the forehead and knelt down by her father.

“I’m sorry I can’t fight for you in this battle. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you. I-“

Selwyn raised his hand slightly...

“My dear Bri... my gorgeous and amazing daughter. There’s nothing you can do. I should be the one protecting you but you’ve shown me through the years you’re strong enough to protect yourself”

Selywn had tears in his eyes. He couldn’t hide how proud he was of his two girls.

“Joanna, be with your mother now. And Brienne with your daughter. You will find strength in each other. My sapphire loves.”

Selywn had lived his life worrying about his family. When his wife died and his twin daughters soon after, he made sure that both Brienne and her brother Galladon were looked after and given everything they wanted. 

When Galladon tragically died in a freak accident, Selywn promised himself that he would do anything for his daughter. And he kept that promise 

When Brienne came back home with child, he did have a slight bit of anger through his body. Anger that someone would take advantage like that to his daughter, but he was excited to become a grandfather.

When little Jo was born, the smile that came from his face beamed around. He held that babe ever so gently in his large hands and whispered his promises to her.

“I’ll protect you, I’ll love you, you are everything to me my love”

Brienne and Joanna loved Selwyn with all their hearts. He meant the world to both of them. But now.... now life was about to change. 

.... 

The night went on. Selwyn went in and out of sleep. His hours were cutting short.

Both Brienne and Joanna held onto Selywn as he closed his eyes for the final time. 

Brienne was now the new Evenstar...


	3. Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Old friends reunite in Evenfall Hall.

A funeral was being arranged for the Evenstar for the following weeks. Brienne had letters sent out to all of whom she knew that may want to come to pay their respects. His body laid at rest, waiting for the vast crowds that were about to gather to pay their respects. His body was dressed in his house cloak, a large cloak for a large man. Decorated with sapphires and waved embroidery, it was fit for the old Evenstar.

Brienne and Joanna were the first there to pay respects to their father/ grandfather. Both women, who were as equally as strong as each other had tears gleaming in their eyes as they saw the Evenstar in the state of rest. 

He was beautiful. His skin was clear. He hair was neatly parted, beard trimmed. He had a straight mouth but with a hint of that smirk he gave to Joanna when they would see each other.

Joanna had never really experienced death or loss of a loved one in her life. Yes she had seen many village people come and go but her only family was her mother and Grandfather and her uncle Tyrion who only visited when it was possible. The pain was heavy in her heart. She had lost her best friend, her grandfather, her leader.

Brienne stood in her tunic, Tarth sigil attached, with her head bowed to her father. She knew he was at peace now and that it was her turn to carry on his legacy. She knew she could never fill his boots but to keep them warm. To keep on what he had started in Tarth when he became the Evenstar. Brienne had been in training for the past number of years to take over the role due to her fathers age. But now it was real. She had to rule the island by herself. As well as being a mother...

Joanna began to sniffle a bit due to her emotions. Brienne moved closer to her daughter and embraced her in a tight hug. A hug Joanna hasn’t felt in a long time due to the busy schedule that her mother had. She bent her head to her mothers arm and the two began to walk back into their rooms to prepare for the guests coming.

On arriving back to their corridor, Brienne turned around and looked at her daughter. 

“Joanna. I’m sorry for not being around much recently. I missed a lot of you growing up and I know how much you miss him. I’m sorry”

Joanna burst out into a flood of tears, unnatural to the young lady. She was overwhelmed with the emotional pain of loosing her grandfather. She needed those words from her mother. 

“Mother... I love you. I do. I’m here for you. I made a promise and I’m here”

The two stood face to face, both extremely red from emotion (Joanna got that from her mother) and smiled at each other. They then went their separate ways in preparation.

\- - - - - - -  
Joanna had ever seen her mother show much emotion. She was always a hard but sort of soft but still hard sort of person. She rarely smiled and when she did it was really only in front of the one person that really made her happy, her father. Joanna was completely taken back from her own mother embracing her in a hug. She hadn’t been hugged by her since she was 7 or so. 

Joanna looked out upon the window to see the boats coming into the harbour in preparation for the burial of her grandfather. It didn’t seem real. He had only passed 2 days ago but Joanna still had it in her head that he was still here.

With every boat that came in, Joanna waited and waited for a certain ship to come in. The ship that carried Tyrion Lannister. Tyrion and Joanna shared a strange bond. He only visited every rare moon but when he came about, he and Joanna went on different journeys around Tarth, exploring every little nook and cranny. He acted like an uncle to Joanna, bringing her little gifts from places like Winterfell, talking with her and her mother, spending time with Brienne.

Joanna missed him dearly. The last time he had came over was for her 13th Name Day. The meeting was cut short however when Joannas mother told him to leave a couple of days into his visit. She had never found out why her mother was so so mean to Tyrion, but had many ideas what it may have been. On the night of her 13th name day, Tyrion was talking about a man, a man who her mother apparently knew quite well. Joanna was meant to be in her bed but snuck in after hearing some sort of commotion happening. Her mother got up in tears that night and told Tyrion that she "didn't have the heart to tell her" and that Tyrion needed to leave soon before her emotions got the best of her. He left the next morning.

She wrote often to Tyrion, never mentioning about that man and he replied often. She never asked her mother either, she knew better not to. 

\- - - - - - -

After waiting for what seemed an eternity, one of the servants came in to tell her that her mother was asking for her in the hall near the entrance of Evenfall Hall, her home. It was around mid noon at this time and Joanna was hoping to see Tyrion.

She walked towards her mother, who was standing next to a few people she didn't recognize and one she hadn't seen in quite a while. Podrick Payne... Ser Podrick Payne that he now went by was standing right next to her mother, who was smiling. Next to Podrick was a tall, slim woman with fire red hair, someone she knew was Sansa, one of her mother nearest and dearest friends who Joanna had never met before, but her mother visited on a few occasions for meetings. Next to Sansa, who was noticeably with child, stood another woman, who was shorter, Arya Stark, the hero of WInterfell. Joanna had always wanted to meet both of the Stark sisters due to the stories her mother used to tell her about her time at WInterfell and with the sisters. 

Joanna smiled at the strangers and stood beside her mother.

"Everyone, this is my daughter Joanna" announced Brienne.

"Joanna it is so great to finally meet the daughter of my dearest friend!" Sansa walked over and held Joannas hand.

"I'm so happy to finally see the Stark sisters my mother speaks often of. Arya... wow! You look how mother described you!" Joanna blushed hard, she was meeting a woman who she truly looked up to.

Arya beamed a great smile, while Sansa started to laugh. Podrick was standing right beside her and took a hold of Sansas hand.

"You are so like her Joanna in many ways. Brienne practically brought you up to be a mini Arya. Sansa darling the likeness is there in the way she dresses isn't it?" 

Brienne smiled more while looking at her family.

"Podrick and Sansa, how is Young Cat doing? Is she excited for a new little one?" Brienne stared down at Sansas growing stomach.

"Brienne she won't stop looking too hold the baby. She is absolutely hilarious. I can't wait to bring her over some day. It's been hard enough trying to rule Winterfell I seemed to never have time to ever see you. Tarth is a beautiful place Brienne. I'm so sorry we had to see it in these sad circumstances." Sansa walked over and placed her hand on Briennes shoulder.

Briennes snuffled a bit, trying to take her mind off the unfortunate times. She looked up and smiled at her friends.

"How about we all go and eat some apple berry tarts? Our cook is amazing!" Joanna changed the subject with food, and well she was hungry.

"Ahh you really are Briennes child!" laugh Podrick.

\- - - - - - - - 

Over some tea and tarts the group talked about WInterfell, Podrick and his new horse, Arya and her on/off relationship with Gendry and about Joanna, the golden child of Brienne, whom everyone loved. A Guard walked in that time and made an announcement.

"Evenstar, Tyrion Lannister is requesting to see you"

Joanna hopped off her seat smiling. Her friend was back

"Mother He is back!"

Brienne smiled and told the guard to let him in.

After a while Tyrion walked in, his head hung low.

"Brienne, Joanna, I'm ever so sorry about the Evenstar.... but I found someone..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello... wow it has been a long long time.
> 
> University took over and I had half this chapter wrote in February but hadn't the time to finish it. I am so so sorry to those who had been waiting and i promise to try and type more hehe.
> 
> thanks for the Kudos.. and I SHALL hopefully see you soon!!!
> 
> xoxo megan


	4. Ghosts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The secret person.. who are they?

"Joanna stay here with Sansa please" Brienne stood up and followed up to Tyrion.

"But mother..." 

"Joanna. I said stay her until I see who it is please"

Joanna looked up at her mother, she wanted so badly to go and see this stranger as well as to talk to Tyrion. She sat back down onto her seat, slightly disheartened.

As her mother left the room, she looked at Sansa with a confused expression.

"I wonder who that could be. Tyrion looked quite concerned... almost like he had seen a ghost.

Sansa looked at Joanna and laughed.

"Oh young Joanna. You have such a young soul and adventurous mind. You remind me of Arya when she was small."

Joanna smiled at Sansa, although she wasn't that interested at this point at hearing more about the lives of the Stark girls but more about who the mysterious person was.

Arya announced she was going for a walk around the streets to get out into the fresh air and to explore a but while Joanna stared as she left. Joanna thought a lot about the hero of Winterfell, always wanting to meet her childhood idol and now she was in her house.

"Arya, can you tell me later on how you killed... You know?" Joanna was getting nervous and going a shade of red.

"The Night King, Walder Frey or who else? I shall tell you everything" Arya laughed as she left the room.

Joannas face lit up. She loved the stories her mother used to tell her and now the Arya Stark could tell her. 

"So Joanna tell us, how are you? How is your mother? We have missed our most loved friend!" asked Sansa

"Mother has been fine. Grandfather was a massive part of our lives and now he is gone..."

Joanna was getting emotional thinking about her recent loss. She sat uncomfortably. Joanna was about to excuse herself from the group when another guard walked in.

"Lady Joanna, you are needed in your room."

"I told you I am not a lady, just Joanna!" Joanna grunted at the guard.

"She really is a mini Brienne!" laughed Podrick.

As Joanna left the room she stuck her tongue out at Pod who was still laughing.

\- - - - - - - 

Brienne wandered behind Tyrion, a large expression of worry and confusion on her face. She kept asking Tyrion who this person was but he wasn't saying nothing. Instead he kept walking.

Tyrion on the other hand was shaking. He couldn't believe what he seen with his own eyes. He really couldn't.

"Tyrion please. Please tell me who it is. This is my home please."

"Ser Brienne I can't. Not until you have seen with your own eyes."

Brienne sighed at that. The only person who really called her that name now was Podrick. Ser was a past memory of Briennes. One of her favourite.

"Where is this person then?"

"They were found by the docks. I overheard some mumbling and went to see what was happening and saw the person."

Brienne was trying figure out who this person was when she realized... was it Tormund. Had he came to pay his respects or irritate her?

Brienne tried to shake that thought out of her head. She had a great disliking to that man, especially after the long night when he tried to comfort her several times before Podrick put him in his place.

As they got closer to the docks, Tyrion was looking around anxiously. He was looking for that person.

It was noticeable that he couldn't find this unknown stranger. He looked completely lost.

Brienne walked over and asked one of her most loyal guards Gus about this person.

"Who is this person and where are they? Please Gus this is urgent!"

"Evenstar, I'm afraid I have not seen this person. Also by the talks and whisperers of the other guards, said person has appeared to have gone missing."

Brienne looked even more confused. She thought her guards were smart enough not to let someone walk away easily. Maybe this person was sly, easy talking possibly. As Brienne stood deep in her thoughts, Tyrion came back looking even more as confused.

"Brienne, it appears to seem that he has left. But was spotted running towards your home."

Brienne looked at Tyrion, her deep blue eyes now looking deep into Tyrion.

"So he has gone missing and is potentially heading to my house... TYRION WHO IS THIS PERSON?"

Brienne felt bad for raising her voice but she was worried about who this person was and if Joanna was going to be in any potential danger. She started walking back home briskly, motioning for Tyrion to follow behind her.

"Brienne, I'm not completely sure who he is. But I think you may"

Brienne looked back at Tyrion who was swiftly jogging behind her. She was about to open her mouth when she heard a large commotion in the distance.

"Is that him? What will the Evenstar say about this? It can't be? Why would he be here for?" Muttered several voices.

Brienne walked over to see what was happening and what she saw, would change her life forever...

\- - - - - - - 

Joanna was back in her room waiting to see who was there. She walked in and set her sword down onto her desk along with her lesson work which she hadn't started and probably wouldn't start. She looked around but couldn't see if anyone was near. She then thought maybe her mother sent for her to go to her room as a way for her to stay in the castle. Smart idea mother, Joanna thought.

Joanna walked towards her chest to get ready for bed when there was a large knock on the door. She walked across and opened it to see Arya Stark, looking a bit breathless.

"Joanna, stay in your room please. I'm staying with you"

Joanna started to panic. Was her mother okay? Was there a attack happening?

"But I need to help"

Arya stood closer to the girl and placed her arm around Joannas shoulder.

"Your mother needs to do this alone. Stay here"

Joanna looked out her window which showed a large amount of the streets towards the dock looking for her mother. She stood there for a significant period of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!   
> thanks for all the kudos an i hoped you enjoyed the chapter!


	5. Run

“The Kingslayer”

“The man without honour”

“The Evenstars will not be pleased will she.”

“Oh to the seven how is he here? Didn’t he die with his sister lover?”

Those were the mumbles around the streets of Tarth. Every person who grew up on Tarth seemed to have been out when they heard the commotion. Seeing who was on their streets during the darkest days since Selwyns death. 

As Brienne made her way back towards her house, with Tyrion running behind her, she had one thing on her mind, keep Joanna safe. This person may be here to hurt her daughter, she needed protected...

“Tyrion, who is this? You should know!?! Why do you think I know?”

Brienne was starting to sound anxious as she spoke to Tyrion. He caught up beside her and began to mumble out a few words.

“He....... was......... asking........ for you”

Brienne stopped in her tracks and turned around.

“They’re a HE? Oh to the seven is it that Gianstbane man... why is he here for?”

Tyrion shook his head and laughed.

“I’m sorry for laughing but no, it definitely wasn’t him. It was a man with a long greying beard and hair. He looked sort of scummy and well old.”

Brienne kept thinking as she walked on... that was when she heard a yell coming from the direction of Joannas room.

\- - - - - - -

Arya and Joanna were sitting and waiting for further news. It had seemed like a lifetime since she was told to wait and stay. She wanted to ask Arya a trillion questions about her life, as of course Joanna loved to hear about the girls who her mother loved dearly.

“So em Arya... why did you leave and what did you find on your journeys and oh how about Gendry? How was it...”

Arya laughed at the young girl and held up her hand.

“Wait a second my dear child, one question at a time.”

“Well then what about the journey you went on? What did you find?”

Arya stood up from Joannas room and walked around to Joannas bookshelf of trinkets. She picked up a wooden box carved with moons and stars and traced the patterns with her fingers.

“This box, I got for your mother when I found out she had you. A pleasant surprise you were indeed, a miracle perhaps. So when I was in a small village on my travels, I had this made for you. I didn’t know if you were a male or female but a box seemed nice as a gift. Honestly I don’t know what babies like. But this box is made for your collections of treasures.”

“Look inside, I’ve got a few knives and rocks from that one time we went visit Tyrion in Casterly. Did you know that Casterly is the home place of the Lannsiters, oh and that Tyrion killed his own father on the outhouse? Strange right?”

Arya became quite uncomfortable but didn’t show. She knew who else grew up on the Rock... the twins. The lovers some may say... Arya looked inside and saw the black rocks and smiled.

“Well if your mother allows, some day I’ll bring you with me. We might even go and visit Gendry if that’s what you please! However the bull can be in a mood at times.”

Arya and Gendry had a strange relationship. They weren’t married but they loved each other. They were both in their mid thirties and were coming to the stage of sort of settling but still travelling. Also well Arya would be one to just go on her own way and Gendry just followed behind. A set up that worked well.

“Oh please I would love that. But it depends on when I have the time. With mother now the Evenstar I need to step up as I’ll be filing this bore of a town some day. I’d rather be out exploring like you however. Seeing people and villages that haven’t been seen by outsiders in a while, making friends.”

As they talked for another while they heard a knock on the door. Joanna looked up and thought it was going to be her mother, but she didn’t enter which was quite strange. Arya stood up to open the door, with needle by her side, but Joanna ran up and opened the door first...

“Brienne?...”

\- - - - - - -

Up the stairs, around the corner if the hall, towards the grand staircase and down the corridor.

Brienne ran up towards Joannas room and there she saw him.... her whole heart just jumped when she seen his face.

“GET OUT”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay damn it’s been a while but I had a spare hour and was like omg imma update this😂😂 corona has made my life a whole lot busier and well I felt like I had to keep this story going just for a bit... so enjoy and hopefully there’ll not be another 4 month wait *-*


	6. Coldness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback to quite few moons back...

Among the cold corridors of Winterfell held the sense of heat and love. A sense of which was held by a slightly greying lion and a tall, now knight of the seven kingdoms. Every since that one night when he stumbled into her living quarters and started to undress due to the warmth of the room, she knew she was in love. She knew long before that to be rightly honest, but she didn’t know how to say as such. 

Brienne of Tarth wasn’t the “Lady” that she was meant to be. Instead of sewing and talking about “Lady Things” she was out fighting with the boys and coming back with cuts and bruises instead of curled hair and powdered cheeks. But in this moment with Jaime Lannister she felt not like a long legged “Ugly” woman but like a proper woman... or well as proper as she could feel. He touched her gently, whispered sweet words into her ears and made her feel the most comfort as she had felt in the first time really in her adult life. 

Every night after so he made his way to her room, very casually some may say. He walked down those long cold corridors and always knew he would feel the warmth of her room. Maybe Winterfell always being cold was a great situation for Jaime. Jaime Lannister always liked the warmth, he loved the comfort of the warmth, and Briennes arms. Their nights together spent either talking about the future, quite uncanny to say the least, or well under the bedsheets, worshipping each other’s bodies. 

They spent many a night under those sheets. He taught her how to love herself more, to be comfortable with her own body. He loved her dearly and she saw that. She wanted every so badly to tell him that, but the thought of commitment to another person scared her. She had spent many of her childhood days worrying about who her father was going to marry her off to. Three men came and gone, one of which slightly more bruised than he came in, but it was that memory that caused her distrust in commitment to others. She couldn’t face being with a person whom she didn’t love, but Jaime Lannister was different.

Their beginning wasn’t the best, quite comical to say the least. He called her all the names under the moon, and she felt hate upon him for the snarky attitude. Yes, he was her prisoner, but at times she thought she was better off being one. But through it all they seemed to had gained trust in one another. He respected her and she respected him. That night in the baths when he told her everything, about why he was called the Kingslayer, why people hated him. How he did it to save a nation of people, why he killed the king. Brienne held onto him, both as naked as their name-day, and it was then she knew she could trust him, despite his name, Lannister. Throughout all their meetings she was always happy to see him, even though some of the circumstances weren’t the best. She liked seeing his quirky smile and his now greying locks. And how he walked and how he talked and oh to the seven Brienne was in love....

But then he left. He left...

He got up out of the bed that they had shared and went back to her... the woman who caused a lot of pain in his life, who made him feel cold. She stood there in the cold as he went off on the horse. And that was the last time she seen him. All she had left of him was the traces of his presence in her room and then the bastard in her belly...

Well that was until now...

\- - - - - - - 

“Mother who is this man? Why is he in my room, mother please now tell me!” 

Joanna started to panic, her mother was bright red in the face from either anger or from the run she had endured. She walked towards the man who was standing at her doorway, her mother just behind him, and was staring at his eyes.

“Oh to the seven Brienne, I never thought I’d...”

At that stage, the man standing in the doorway dropped to the ground and lay silently. Brienne quickly called for the guards to come and bring him into another room and look after him. Joanna stood, trembling as Arya stood and held onto her. Who was this man in her room and what did he want with her mother? Was he there to murder her? Was he a stalker of her mother... was he? Oh no it couldn’t be...

“Mother please come here and tell me. Who is he?”

“Joanna that’s enough!” Brienne loudly spoke out to her daughter. 

“I’ll tell you later. Arya do you mind if I speak to you in private?”

The Stark girl nodded and walked out the door with Brienne. Joanna ran up and out her hear at the door to see if she could here the mumbles of the two women... and all she could hear was “I don’t know what to say...”

The fear took over the young girl, but the one voice she could hear in her head was her grandfathers. 

“You’re a Tarth. You’re as strong as the wind, as tall as the waves and most importantly as beautiful as a sapphire” 

She needed to be strong as the wind right now. She needed to be strong for her mother who seemed to be in a shock. This person obviously had history with her mother and the one suspicion that came into her mind was about his eyes. Those eyes were very very familiar...

Joanna waited forever what seemed like an eternity for her mother to come back. She looked out the window onto the waves and thought about happy memories of life on Tarth. Of how she grew up with a loving mother and a grandfather. How that just because she didn’t have a father that she was well respected by the people of Tarth and would grow up to be the next Evenstar after her mother. Why the word father came into her mind then was quite mysterious. She never really cared about having a father. She was happier not knowing who he was. When she was younger, she used to imagine her father as a tall, slim man with golden curls like her and he would hold her close at night and take her for horse rides and sword training during the day. But that was just silly childhood dreams. She survived 15 years with a loving grandfather and a mother, who wasn’t always there for her but still loved her dearly. 

A knock came to the door and her mother walked in, still bright red in the face and looking like she had shed a tear or two.

“Mother, come here and sit with me.”

Brienne walked over to her daughters bed and held her arm out. Joanna looked into her mother’s bright blue eyes and cuddled up beside her, which was a rare occasion to be rightly honest. Joanna could hear her mothers heartbeat pounding quicker than normal. She knew she was panicking about something... or someone. 

The past few days had been a lot, and with the morning being the funeral and the mysterious man here, Joanna was worried for her mother.

“You don’t have to tell me who he is, or why he asked for you but I do want to know... are we safe? Grandfather always reminded me that Tarth was one of the safest isles in the Kingdoms but I’m worried. I’m worried about you to. You seem unhappy and yes I know it’s hard with grandfathers passing but I need to know if you are okay?”

Brienne tried to never really cry. But in that moment she started to swell up. She was sniffling as she held closely to her daughter, and took a couple of deep breath’s.

“We are fine. We are going to get through this. But first let’s bury grandfather...”

That night, Joanna slept beside Brienne. Both sobbing over Selwyn and talking about the memories.

\- - - - - - - 

Down the corridor, and into the lower halls lay awake that mysterious man with the long grey beard and the vivid green eyes. Still yearning for the woman he had loved since he first lay his eyes on her. He was still calling for her name. 

“Ser Brienne”

“Wench?”

“Brienne....”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in a space of a couple of days ^~^
> 
> This fic has so much more to it and I wanna say thank to to all those who leave kudos and comments! 
> 
> Once again hopefully I’ll update soon and please keep reading xox 
> 
> Megs xoxo xoxo


	7. Truths are told

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ye all know what’s gonna happen =)

The morning of the funeral came around. Both Brienne and Joanna got up out of the bed that they slept on that night and got ready in their black tunics for the day. Brienne had her Evenstar badge placed on her cloak, Joanna wearing one of her grandfathers older cloaks he wore before he became the Evenstar many a moon ago. 

As they walked hand in hand down the corridors to the great hall, they stopped for a second to look out the window at the waves. A storm had started that morning and the waves were pretty wild. Storms were Selwyns favourite and today was quite fitting for the final goodbye of the loved leader.

As the funeral came and gone, Joanna barely left her mothers side. She was there at all times for her mother during these fragile times. However, in the back of her head was about the man with the green eyes staying in her home. Her mother still hadn’t kicked him out, whoever he was, and she was quite confused to say the least. 

Thought all the “I’m sorry for your loss” and the “you look so much like your mother”, Joanna was entirely fed up with the day. She wanted to just go back to her room, or her mothers, and talk about her grandfather. 

Brienne left for a little while after along with Tyrion and told Joanna to stay with Arya. Maybe they were going to talk about their last encounter with each other, where Tyrion left suddenly.

Arya and Joanna both went for a walk around the beach, to help keep Joannas mind off the funeral and to talk more about her mothers time with the Stark girls.

\- - - - - - -

Brienne and Tyrion parted ways and Joanna met back up with her mother as they freshened up for their evening meal in one of the smaller halls. 

After the evening meal, that was ate in the presence of Brienne close friends, they all sat around the fire talking about some random laws that were being set by King Bran, laws that Joanna really couldn’t give a care about. It was then she was sitting and still thinking about the man in her house... who was still here. It was then Joanna stood up all of a sudden and sort of changed the mood of the room.

“Who is that man...”

Brienne turned quickly and stared at her daughter in shock. She then looked towards Tyrion, who looked towards Sansa, who looked towards Arya, who looked towards Pod, who then looks towards Brienne (quite comical to say the least). Brienne began clearing her throat and looked quite anxious. She stood up, along with Tyrion, and walked towards her daughter.

It was at this point were Joanna knew there was something about this mysterious stranger that may potentially change her life. She took her mothers hand once again as Brienne tried to compose herself with whatever words she was about to speak. 

The others quickly cleared the room, knowing what was about to happen but strangely to Joanna, Tyrion stayed.

“I need you to stay calm Joanna... I need you to promise me not to get angry at me or severely mad... please Joanna!”

Joanna looked up at her mother and slowly nodded. She didn’t know if this news was going to be the best or if it was going to mess her life up a little but more. She sat and waited for her mother to compose herself once again. Tyrion walked over and held Briennes hand. They had seemed to have made up and put their differences aside, thought Joanna. 

After a long wait, Brienne cleared her throat and began to talk....

“Have I ever told you about your father?...”

\- - - - - - - 

The other thought in Briennes mind during the funeral of her dear father was about him... her mourning heart and mind thought about him.

It was been 16 years.... sixteen....

And for him to come washed up on shore at all times... Brienne didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. 

After the crowds has began to disappear, Brienne headed towards the direction of Tyrion, who was talking to Podrick. 

“Tyrion..... I think it’s time”

Podrick knew what was coming, Sansa had told him the night before about the person coming back. Podrick walked over to his old friend and held her hand. She looked into his eyes and smiled faintly at him.

Then, both Brienne and Tyrion left the great hall and began walking to the small room where he was being kept in.

The guards at the door stood aside as Tyrion entered the room, with Brienne walking close behind. The mysterious man stood up from his bed, but due to the shackles around his ankles, he couldn’t exactly move far. Brienne didn’t put him in the shackles, that was all Tyrion’s ideas... he didn’t want the person to run away... again.

“I don’t know what to say... I’ve been imagining this day for the past many moons since I left.... but I’m here now....”

His eyes were bloodshot red from what seemed like hours of crying, to Briennes sort of delight but also sadness.

“I can’t.... I don’t know how to put this through my mind.... YOU ARE DEAD” Brienne yelled as if he was a ghost. “YOU ARE NOT REAL.... oh to the seven what have I dine to deserve to be haunted by my past?”

Brienne clear her throat. She didn’t mean to yell, but a mixture of emotions that included shock and pain came through her body when he spoke.

“Brienne look at me... please look at me. I need you to know what I’m about to say is real and the truth.”

Brienne looked at the eyes of the person, who was now in tears. She stared at those bright green eyes, the memories of their happier times coming back into her mind. But also the memories of how he had left her standing in the yard. Standing alone as he went off to his bloody sister. Tyrion walked over and held Briennes palm. He could see she was in pain as well. The emotions building up in her bodies.

“Okay... Ser Brienne. That night I left... Oh it pains me to even think of that night. I know I broke your heart... I know how I just turned away from what we had... I loved you Brienne, I still love you.” He began to swell up thinking of that night. He didn’t know how to continue, but the words kept coming. 

“I went back to her. She told me she was pregnant and knowing she was about to die... I felt like I had to be with her...”

Brienne at that moment walked over to look out at the window. The storm was still occurring and her fathers words were now clear in her mind.

“You’re a Tarth. You’re as strong as the wind, as tall as the waves“

She needed to be strong at this moment. She couldn’t let anger get a hold of her. She needed answers.

“The news of our deaths... wasn’t entirely true.” He smirked. “I woke up under my sister.... she had fell on top of me as the bricks fell. She basically saved my life, which I find quite hilarious after all the pain she put me through... I woke up after a few days I think. It was then I had to try and get myself out of the wreckage.”

After stalling for a moment, Jaime, who was trying not to break down again, tried to recall those memories of trying to escape unseen.

“I crawled out through the rocks somehow. My leg was absolutely shattered from the debris. Once I saw light I knew I had to keep going. Cersei being dead.... it was sort of a relief for me. I didn’t have to worry about her as such. Oh and she wasn’t pregnant, she lied once again... I had said my final goodbyes when I thought we had died. As I crawled out towards the light, I found a few stray horses around. That’s when I knew I was free. I grabbed onto one and out of the Kingdom I went. No one seen me due to the smoke and flames.”

Brienne looked straight into Jamie’s eyes, anguish in her face. All along Jaime had gone back and well survived. All these years he had basically secretly mourned his death, had his child, tried to get over him, and he was alive all along?

“So that’s why they couldn’t find your body? We were told it was probably at by wild animals... They found your sisters however...”

Tyrion, who had stayed silent this whole time, walked over to his brother.

“We buried her just beside father... He would have loved that. Jaime I’m sorry, I’m sorry that she died but I can’t forgive her for what she done to me over my life. I’m sorry...”

“Tyrion, I’m sorry, I should have protected you better. As I rode out of Kingslanding all I could think of was my family. You, Cersei and father.... Brienne... I’m sorry for leaving. Oh to the seven if only I could go back in time....”

“But you did leave Jaime... you left me standing there in the cold after sharing my bed. After telling me how much you loved me... after letting me learn to love myself. And now you’re back, I don’t know how to react. Are you going to leave again. Are you going to betray me again? I can’t say I’m glad that you’re here, but I’m not upset about it. I’m overwhelmed at the fact that your alive. But please tell me, why did it take you all these moons to come back?” 

That took a lot out of Brienne to say. A lot of her feelings went through her words then.

“I went into hiding. I was trapped for a few years working in a farm. I had money to pay off. I didn’t know if anyone would have wanted to see me again. These past 16 years were spent building up courage to come back. And that was until I heard the news of your poor father. To the seven Brienne I am so so sorry for your loss... I’m sorry,”

Brienne nodded her head. She needed more answers.

“So you went into hiding so you wouldn’t get killed?”

“I started off in a forest. Spending my nights under the trees, not being able to hurt anyone. Quite luxurious to be fairly true. It was then after a few nights I knew I had to sort out my leg. It had became a purple colour due to the injuries and the pain was unbearably bad. I rode off for a few days, making sure I was as far away from anyone that could recognise me and got help from a maester, whom I told I had called and badly injured my leg. That’s how I owed money. He was looking a payment and I left Kingslanding with nothing except the clothes on my back and the horse. He didn’t want the horse before you ask...”

“I worked on a farm for many years then. Funny isn’t it, the son of Tywin Lannister, one of the richest men about, working in dirt. I stayed there for a while. I made a few friends even. I lived in a house with 2 other men and we worked day and night getting crops in and animals fed. I stayed there for 12 years. Trying to rebuild my life. But I couldn’t forget about my life. My family... you. I wanted to leave that farm but I couldn’t until I had paid back every last gold piece... an expensive maester to say the least. After so I left and went from town to town looking for any sign of Tyrion, you or those I knew from my past. I made my way, staying in places for a few months, working job to job everywhere I went to afford to feed myself. That was when I found myself just outside Winterfell.”

The name of the place where Jaime and Brienne reunited. The place where their daughter was conceived thought Brienne. The daughter he didn’t know about... That place where he loved her and left her.

“It was there I found out that your were still alive. I didn’t go into Winterfell but stayed around the outskirts. I had heard from a few at a bar about your fathers illness and how you were going to become the Evenstar. I knew then in my heart that I had to see you. I had put it off for so so long and I knew I had my chance to see you. I rode off to the direction that night to the dock to get to Tarth. For day and night I only stopped for break to feed the horse and myself at times. Once I got just outside the docks I found out of your fathers passing. I didn’t know whether I should have continued or not. I knew you needed to grieve for a while so I waited... I sat and tried to imagine how to say ‘hello lady Brienne, I’m actually alive after all these years’ to you.”

“I sat looking out in the hill of the dock and seen the Stark boat pass by and headed towards Tarth. I got even more nervous knowing that i may see more faces I knew. Faces that probably hate me even more. I got a ticket for the latest boat out that night and that was when I was sort of detained at the dock of Tarth. I was supposedly acting suspicious to your guards, but that was due to the nerves in my body and I was shaking and asking where you were. I heard whispers of some saying my old name ‘kingslayer’ and I knew I had to escape before someone tried to arrest me and threw me into a dungeon or even kill me. Your guards turned for one moment as I ran off towards what I hoped and sort of knew was your home. You seriously need to get them to tie their knots better (he began to laugh).”

She held her words, even though she wanted to bark back at him about his jape about the guards. She even had to try and hide a laugh surprisingly.

“I got through the front door, the guards weren’t there, I suppose they were at the funeral, and I followed voices, that was when I heard a voice that I recognised. Arya Stark. A voice I never thought I would hear again. So therefore I followed and found the room where she was in, hoping you were inside and saw Arya and a girl... whoever she was, Aryas child maybe? And then you came and I saw and hear your tremor and I blacked out... reminded me sort of that time in the baths...”

She wanted to laugh at how he thought Joanna was Aryas child. She didn’t know if it was wise to say yet that he had a daughter. But for now she needed to talk to Joanna and process all she had heard.

At this point Brienne knew she had been away for long enough and walked towards the door. Jaime looked shocked to see she was leaving without saying many words and she was about to walk out. She turned around and faced him.

“I need time Jaime. You can stay or leave, you are free to go, but let me think before I can say anything. I have to go...” 

She walked out with Tyrion behind her, who smiled at his brother, and left Jaime Lannister sitting and thinking about what had just happened...

\- - - - - - -

*TBC*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m really bad at writing funerals as I’ve never been to one, so that’s why I sort of jumped over that... soz Selywn stans 😂
> 
> But damnnnnn Jaime Lan is backkk!
> 
> Also sorry for any spelling mistakes ^-^

**Author's Note:**

> Please Comment and Send those wee kudos xo


End file.
